Stray cats

There are lots of stray cats that hang around campus at night. The last two nights I have passed the same cat wandering around. In a way that cat reminds me of myself. He is all alone in the world and all he can do is wander and try to avoid people. That is kind of the way I feel. I’m alone, and yet when people try to get close I run. Who knows if they are trying to help or chase me away? Not that it matters, I’m going to run anyway. The difference between that cat and me is that he is probably happy with life. He gets to be free and doesn’t have many cares. I bet that stray cat slept last night. Where as I, despite my pillows and blankets, couldn’t seem to settle myself enough to get much of anything that even resembled rest. Now don’t get my wrong, I’m not saying that my life it so bad. I have a place to live, a job, clothes, food, etc. I have all the things that I need to survive, but I guess my point is more whether my life is worth surviving. The beautiful thing about being a cat is that their cognitive development isn’t such that they can really process problems. They don’t have emotions or relationships to be ruined.

Some might argue that without the pain in life there couldn’t be the joy. Well right now I just want it all to go away. I don’t want to have to think and feel anymore. I just want to be. Maybe in the long run my life is a lot better than that stray cat’s, but right now am jealous of a small furry creature curled up in a bush somewhere near the Fletcher building.