Bite me. (I have wanted to say that for so long!)

I have decided that I just need to get out some aggressive energy and this is a pretty safe way to do that. So here goes (don't hate me):

I'm just so sick of people pretending to care. Why the heck would they do that?!?! I mean either you care or you don't, don't make it worse by pretending that you care about me just so that you can feel better about yourself at the end of the day. I don't want to be your good deed or your charity case. I can take care of myself. And believe me I'm great at feeling bad for myself, I don't need you to feel bad for me too. So, to all those people that make little comments that make it seems like they care and then turn around and forget all about me, please just leave me alone. I am starting to feel like the members of my family are the only people that really care. And that is fine. See I have people who REALLY care so I don't need your terrible acting to further interrupt my life further.

OK... I think that might have been a bit much... but on the up side I feel a lot better!

Sorry I'm crazy...

Dare to be happy and whole.

Being happy isn't something that just happens, it takes courage. It is so easy to sit back and say that life sucks. It is natural to find lots of things to bring you down and make you sad or upset. But to be happy takes work. You have to be brave enough to rise above the gloom and strong enough to carry others up with you. My dad has always said that I just need to chose to be happy. Well I don't know if I fully agree with him... but in a way he is right. If I don't make the effort to make my life a better place then why should I expect others to try and make me feel better? Everyone has problems and hard times. No one's life if easy. It takes a lot to decided to let yourself be whole. With every bad thing that happen a little piece of you gets chipped away. People go through things everyday and they can chose to be affected by it or not. What if you made the decision that those hard times weren't going to chip away at your happiness? What if I decided that I always want to be whole? It won't be easy. But I think that I'm strong enough to be happy. I always want to be the kind of person that is strong enough to keep the world from making me hard. I always want to be innocent, even though I know all the bad things out there and have even felt how much they can hurt. I know that I'm not really making a lot of sense and that all my metaphors are getting mixed up and clashing... but I just want you all to know that I'm going to dare to be happy and whole.